Patient: Doctor, what does the X-ray of my head show?
Doctor: Absolutely nothing!

Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 hours! That's terrible! What could be worse? What's the very bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday

A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke? 
B: Ok A: A white horse fell in the mud.

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies? 
Student: I don't know. 
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from? 
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor

Son: Dad, what is an idiot? 
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? 
Son: No.

Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?" 
Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?" 
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!" 
Nick: "I don't think I know either, Sir!"

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