TEACHER: What's the longest word in the English language ?
Pupil: Smiles - because there is a mile between the first and last letters !

TEACHER: What is an island ?
Pupil: A piece of land surrounded by water except on one side.
TEACHER: On one side ?
Pupil: Yes, on top !

MUM:Why does your geography exam have a big zero over it?
Pupil: It's not a zero, the teacher ran out of stars, so she gave me a moon instead !

Teacher: What's 2 and 2?
Pupil: 4
Teacher: That's good.
Pupil: Good?, that's perfect!

Teacher: Where is your homework?
Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren't the best teacher in the school

Mother: What did you learn in school today
Son: How to write 
Mother: What did you write?
Son: I don't know, they haven't taught us how to read yet

Teacher: Be sure that you go straight home
Student: I can't, I live just round the corner!
 





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